whingewhingewine

I don't really believe in letting dogs on the furniture*. Unfortunately she did not get the memo on this. *I don't actually mind. Each to their own. Quite like a doggy snuggle. Could do without the face kisses though. Grim. They lick their own bums! At least humans only lick other people's.

My post yesterday reminded me of this one; the absolute worst ways to get woken up by your offspring. Although, a paw to the groin and a face covered in slobber isn't ideal either, I've since decided.

I can hear an owl outside. He's probably saying "fuck, it's wet".

Good morning! This came up on my Facey memories today. Made me think about what scares me these days. The thought of high school for sure. And still the footsteps on the landing every evening, still that.

I know it's controversial, but if I were a man in the public eye worried about being 'cancelled' I would simply not sexually assault anyone.

I guess we all feel better after a satisfying poo but my dog's post-dump zoomies are quite the spectacle to behold. The bigger the turd, the more mental she goes. ...Is she broken?

Hi, you wonderful people who live in my phone. I need your assistance. If I were to require a vacuum cleaner capable of clearing up after a shedding hound, what would you recommend? My army of robot vacuums are so overworked they're close to going on strike and the stairs are looking appalling. I know, I know... This is the content you come here for isn't it? Photo of said dog for attention or whatever.

What, those? They're my emotional support bottles of almost empty shampoo and conditioner. I'm afraid I won't be throwing them out.

Things have gotten a little dog-heavy on here of late, so here's a post about last week's outing to MERKUR Bingo Cricklewood. I'm still thinking about their goat curry. Not much to look at but my word, it's good.

Due to a combination of new dog (did I mention her...?) and a very flat tyre I've not been to the gym at all this week, but if I keep doing the school run on foot I might not have to bother 😬 Even the dog couldn't be arsed by the end. It's getting super Autumnal isn't it?! I mean, some of the time. This morning was CHILLY. And then it was swelteringly hot. It's impossible to know how to dress. Sort it out.

A bit about our newest family member, and how she came to be living with us (and why no slippers are safe anymore).