Cynthia Leu

Undercover muscle mommy thangz featuring some of the hundreds of selfies I took on Tuesday lmaooo. Had to include some flexed/unflexed and posed/unposed pics as a lil reminder that every single person you see on this app probably only looks like they do on here 1% of the time 💖 HOPE Y’ALL HAVE AN ABSOFRIGGINLUTELY AWESOME WEEKEND!! ⠀ #selfie #imthatbish #matchingset #ootd #gotd #wfh #wfhstyle #wfhoutfit #fitspo #girlswholift #musclemommy #fitness #flexfriday #flexin #daytonight

Friendly reminder that you have to EAT enough to gain muscle (get that protein in)! And in order to get stronger, you have to gain muscle. And hey, even if your goals aren’t to get stronger and you just want to get “toned” or build a booty, YOU STILL NEED TO GAIN MUSCLE FOR THAT! I don’t miss the days when I was dieting on 1200 calories a day. We’re eating 2000+ calories a day year round 🥰 All aboard the gain train. JOIN ME! #girlswhoeat #girlswholift #gainingweightiscool #powerlifting #gainz #powerliftingprobs #foodisfuel #gymhumor #bulking #bulkingseason #bulkingszn #fitness

I can’t believe January is almost over! How many of y’all made it through dry January? 👀 I didn’t stay dry all of January, but the older I get, the less I drink 😅 Sometimes when I don’t want to drink alcohol, holding something like @clevermocktails can satisfy that habit of having a drink in my hand and putting it in my face at social functions. ⠀ Since I have many sober friends, having non-alcoholic beverage options like @clevermocktails in my fridge for em is nice too 🥰 These gluten-free mocktails made with real botanical extracts are easy to bring with you without worrying about glass. You can bring ‘em to the pool, hot tub, parties, beach… Hell, you can even drive with them since they contain 0% alcohol! 🥳 ⠀ #ad #clevermocktails #mocktails #dryjanuary #mocktail #nonalcoholic #sober #hottub #pink #ginandtonic #moscowmule #mojito #nonalc #hottub #hottubtime

Stories saw em first, but here’s some leuks / personalities from the past couple weeks 🤠 Current obsession: blazers?! Love a good blazer to hide spicier outfits until it’s time to be ✨s p i c y✨ ⠀ Also been throwing a blazer on over athleisure for work so I can go straight to the gym without changing. I prefer living life on easy mode ✨ ⠀ Anyways, it’s been a buuuusy week and I definitely I didn’t make it to the gym today. Been prioritizing my social life a bit and it feels good. Ain’t no shame baby do yo thang 💃🏻 ⠀ #ootd #ootn #thrifted #amazonfashion #amazonfinds #atomichabits #blazer #blazerstyle #blazers

How many times will I repost these pics every LNY because I have yet to find a #qipao that fits me? Prob forever tbh 🤣 (these were clipped in the back just for the picture and then I returned em 😐) ⠀ Happy Lunar New Year! HOPE YOU GET RIIIICCCCHHHH — measured by your love for yourself, the love in your interpersonal relationships, your passion for life, the joy in your life, and in accepting yourself as you are — while also choosing to be/do better. Let’s get rich this way in 2023 🥰💖 ⠀ (Video from @ronnychieng’s @netflix special Asian Comedian Destroys America). Other rightful owners tagged in the pics too. ⠀ #lunarnewyear #chinesenewyear #hopeyougetrich #cny2023 #lny2023 #yearoftherabbot #taiwaneseamerican #selfworth #mentalhealth #cheongsam #qipaodress

HAPPY FRIDAYYAYAYAYY! Since I won’t be able to climb again anytime soon, the nails are back baabyyyy 😌 ⠀ So I went on a date a couple months ago where the dude “complimented me” by calling out how “different” I was from other girls (and of course also talked about how cRaZy his ex was). Me in my 20’s would have thought this was a real compliment 🥴 Now in my 30’s, it’s a yellow flag— typically signaling (unconscious) misogyny/hatred towards women. ⠀ The comments often have to do with “you don’t wear that much makeup or have those lridiculous nails”…. Sweetie, I am exactly like other girls. I’m so done with being the “chill girl” that panders for male validation. That’s how you end up engaged twice over the course of a few years 😭🤣 ⠀ Sooooo we’re out here wearing purple makeup (EVEN to the gym). We’re getting our nails done all ✨c r a z y✨. We’re taking as many selfies as we want. We don’t hold back how we feel out of fear of being perceived as difficult. We call out bullshit. We advocate for our needs. And when our needs aren’t met, we don’t make excuses for inadequacy. We’re also dressing however tf we want because we know our worth isn’t defined by whether certain people respect us or not 🥰 ⠀ Welcome to the Anti Wifey Material Club where there is no such thing as wifey material 😘 ⠀ #notyourwifey #yinyang #yinandyang #yinyangnails #pride #selfie #selflove #🏳️‍🌈 #selfrespect #purplehair #purplemakeup

I wondered if I’d ever share about this on IG after getting diagnosed last year. But I’m in the middle of a hypomanic episode and everything is feeling like a good idea rn so here we are 😅 On average, it takes 8 years after onset of symptoms to get an accurate #bipolar diagnosis. ⠀ For me, the stress I experienced over 2021-2022 in Connecticut caused a number of mixed episodes that were incredibly confusing to navigate. Suddenly everything made sense — why I could be the most happy and confident person I knew, and then swing to the (wait for it) ✨p o l a r✨ opposite — hating myself and lacking confidence 😅 ⠀ I took 3 months of leave from work as I titrated onto a mood stabilizer and reflected on what this meant for me moving forward. Like many others, I was consumed with shame before reaching a point where I forgave myself for the life I lived before I had this info to help me learn how to care for myself better. Now I’m so goddamn PROUD of the life I’ve built and fought for, despite it all. ⠀ I’m still learning my triggers, and while I do so, I’ve set up my life as comfy as possible to remove stressors and allow space to understand myself better. ⠀ I’m grateful to have the medical benefits, resources, and financial means to care for myself. I sometimes want to cry thinking about how broken the US healthcare system is for both physical and #mentalhealth. People are literally going bankrupt just trying to stay alive. I force myself to fit into a 9-5 life despite a deep desire to work for myself because I could not afford the medical benefits without my corporate job. But I won’t get too much into this today. ⠀ I’m sharing because I know I am so far from alone here. I know so many of you have experienced similar journeys of having to learn about yourself and make drastic changes to your life to set yourself up for success. And hey, we’re not in bad company with Taylor Tomlinson, Halsey, Robert Downey Jr, Demi Lovato, Selena Gomez, Mariah Carey, Bebe Rexha, Catherine Zeta-Jones, and more either 😉 Love y’all 💖 ⠀ #bipolarawareness #endthestigma #breakthestigma #gemini #🏳️‍🌈 #mentalhealthawareness #selflove #selfcare #mentalhealthmatters #healing

Just out here learning to love tf out of myself, hbu? (this was the day before I sprained/fractured my foot 🥲) ⠀ Do you keep promises to yourself the same way you keep promises to others? Do you respect YOURSELF as much as you respect others? Cause I sure didn’t 🥴 ⠀ Each time we break a promise to ourselves, those feelings of disappointment, frustration, and distrust are internalized — damaging our self-esteem. If you’re used to letting yourself down, it’s easy to believe that you deserve to be let down by others — and you’ll end up settling for less than you deserve, over and over. ⠀ Something that’s helping me on my (continuous) journey of learning to love myself is: trying to view myself from a friend’s perspective. If you were your own friend would you be satisfied with the reliability in which you keep your promises? 👀 ⠀ Each time we KEEP promise to ourselves, we show ourselves that we are trustworthy, reliable, and deserving. Recognizing that we can trust and rely on ourselves helps improve your self-esteem, and you’ll be much less likely to settle. ⠀ If you flake on yourself more often than you’d flake on others, I hope you’re finding ways to love and treat yourself better. I hope you’re following through with the promises you made to yourself. You deserve it. It’s a new year after the shit show we called 2020-2022 😅 2023 has already been throwing some curve balls but we got this fam. LETS GET ITTTT!! ⠀ #yougotthis #selflove #selfrespect #selfesteem #mentalhealth #selfcare #trustyourself #trustissues #buildingtrust #commitment #respect #youdeserveitall

The meathead edition of @champagnepapi’s “started wearing less and going out more” 🤣 ⠀ #gymreel #gymhumor #girlswholift #gymrat #moveyourbody #pumpcover #losangeles #longbeach #fitspo #bulkingseason #deadlift

Posting this as a warning: PLEASE DON’T BE LIKE ME. ⠀ I thought I had made significant progress in being vulnerable and authentic, but watching these videos of how I just smile and laugh off pain because I don’t like others worrying or feeling sorry for me was… eye opening. I’m even reading a book about what true “toughness” is… and it’s not this 🥴 ⠀ I know how I was feeling internally — in a good amount of pain, but determined to not show any “weakness”. So I wrapped an ice pack around my foot and kept climbing, even as the pain increased and my foot continued to swell and bruise up more and more. This inaccurate definition of what “strength” truly is has led me to be out of touch with myself. I have no barometer for what my limits are, because I only know how to push through. I don’t know when to take my foot off the gas. ⠀ Even afterwards, I continued to refuse help, saying “no” to every person who asked if they could get me anything, until my friend @dpt.5unny & @aoocben who know me too well didn’t ask, and TOLD me they were coming to make me go to urgent care 🙃 ⠀ How I handled this situation was not cool, brave, or strong. It was a complete disregard for my own safety and well-being. It shows insecurity, not bravery. It shows that I choose false bravado over being real and genuine. True bravery would have been putting my ego aside to be honest and ask for and accept help. We’ve got some inner work to do y’all. Hope y’all are taking care of yourselves better than I am 😅 ⠀ #toughness #bravado #machismo #truestrength #resiliency #resilient #mentalhealth #egowork